Last April, I packed a few bags with my maternity clothes and some clothes for 'after.' I had no clothes for the baby and that felt weird. I had hats and booties, books and a sign with his name on it. Not knowing what 'after' would be for us was tough. Would the baby make it through the first days and would we be strong enough to stand next to our son covered in wires, tubes and needles poking out him?
I can still feel the sinking in my stomach I felt at every NST, every ultrasound, every time I felt the baby move. I wasn't alone, so many mothers, CDH and otherwise, have that sinking feeling. It's a shame that any parent would have to think about their child's mortality before he/she is even born. But, I truly believe I was chosen to be a high risk pregnancy. I was picked from above; I guess because I could handle it, not sure. I should include Barry too...he was pretty solid through the whole thing, my rock. Together we did research about what life might be like with a CDHer. We prepared for the possible complications. We prepared for a long and stressful NICU stay. We prepared for bringing home a baby that needed nursing support, therapy, medications, oxygen, a feeding tube, etc. Somehow we escaped a lengthy NICU stay, additional surgeries, at-home support, coming home on O2 and feeding tubes...we were so very lucky.
I'm thinking today of all CDH parents preparing for the next phase in their journey. Little Carter Adler is due today in Cincinnati. Please pray for a safe delivery and smooth beginning.
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